Lately, my child has decided that sleeping at night is for chumps. Why sleep when there are so many other interesting things to do like practicing your ABC’s, singing the Sponge Bob Square Pants theme song, trying to pull your socks off, or throwing your blanket onto the floor? Over and over…..and over….and over again??
When he doesn’t sleep, mommy doesn’t sleep either. I wish I could channel my husband and snore like a drunk and wounded bear so loudly that it drowns out the sounds of my child screaming bloody murder at 3am. But alas, I have superhuman mommy ears and the sound of him sneezing can wake me up out of a dead sleep. So needless to say, I have felt like a walking zombie lately. Yesterday, I was chug-a-lugging coffee like it was going out of style. I needed a caffeine IV to periodically shoot me full of the good stuff. I should invent something like that. A coffee injector. I could make millions off of tired moms alone. The struggle is real y’all.
I know all about pregnancy brain because I felt like my IQ dropped about 50 points when I was pregnant. But I’ve never experienced what I thought was mommy brain. Oh but that definitely changed today though.
I was out and about doing some shopping (of course I was shopping for my son and not for me…even when I purposely go out to shop for myself, I end up shopping for him) and realized that I was starving. I had fed my son his breakfast but completely forgot to feed myself. So I decide to stop at a fast food restaurant to pick up some lunch. I get to the first window and pay. The guy tells me to pull up to the second window to get my food. My sleep deprived brain decided not to hear that part so I just drove off. Literally, I drove past the window and start driving to the store. I get all the way to the front door of the store that I was mindlessly headed to, and decide that I’m thirsty. So I reach for my drink….and only then do I realize that I never stopped to get my food!! I was on the phone with my BFF at the time and told her what I did. That’s when she says, “oh, that’s just mommy brain. Happens to me all the time”. I’d stupidly thought I was immune to mommy brain and I could power through all the sleep deprivation and exhaustion without any side effects. Ha! It must have been mommy brain that made me think that in the first place. Sigh.
If you’re reading this and feel like you’re drunk but you haven’t had a drink, or you’re so tired that you have permanent eye burn, or you have to ask people to repeat themselves when they talk to you because you saw their lips moving but your brain forgot how to process syllables, vowels and consonants, then you too my friend, could be suffering from mommy brain. Next time that you forget your food from a fast food restaurant, just know that you aren’t alone. I’ll pour another cup of coffee for you.